March 4th
Dear Journal,
I don’t usually get a chance to say much in my journal these days, however, I think I will just plunk my butt down here and relax for a while. Zippie and Zednick decided to take a quick trip to Shattrath City to check out the new warehouse and living facilities and they left me in charge of things here in Silvermoon. I sure hope they don’t stay away too long, I don’t like this authority thing at all, I would much rather be just accountable for myself and Kitteh.
Oh hello there, I’m a hunter, I don’t have a head for figures and I sure don’t know all of the employees that come through the doors of the warehouse – I’m usually out in the field doing my job and I usually travel alone. I’m not sure what they were thinking when they told me to take care of things here in town.
Sure, I haven’t really minded the offices being in Silvermoon all that much with the exception that I don’t get to see my friends in Orgrimmar very often anymore. There’s nothing like sitting there in a sunchair, sipping a nice cold one, chatting with your friends and fishing. The fish aren’t bad if you clean them real good and cook them until they are crispy. Sure the gossip is always good and sometimes someone has something to say about the absence of Gallywix trying to lord it over all of us. We all kind of wonder what has happened to him lately – I’m thinking he’s off plotting about how he can grab more money from the goblins and these stupid mooks.
I sure wish that they had taken the Boss’s dingbat sister with them though. She’s mean to me when there aren’t other people around. Oh yeah, now I have to call her Miss Faendra. There are a few other things I’d like to call her, however, I’m not real good at writing swear words – I can say them much better.
I don’t think that Zed and Zippie had been gone more than an hour when Miss Faendra flounced herself into the office and demanded that I hand over the cash box and open the safe for her. Well, she got all upset when I told her the cash box was in the safe and the safe was locked. She yelled at me and told me to open the safe – I can’t open the safe, Zippie never gave me the combination.
Well, she proceeded to call me all manner of names, insulting my parentage, telling me that I was just a green mental midget. That one did make me laugh because it’s true – I am green, I am short and because I’m small, my brain has gotta match, right? I bet I have more great ideas about stuff than she ever has, she’s just a skinny Blood Elf and a lousy hunter. I didn’t tell her about her being a lousy hunter though – which is true, I’ve been out in the field with her once or twice and she’s always worried about breaking a nail or something. I work with my own rules out there – you kill, you clean it and you skin it – nope, I refused to do her job for her, plain and simple. Oh, did I mention that she is a skinny Blood Elf that is lazy too?
She stormed out of the office and headed down into the warehouse to raise trouble with the hired help down there. Apparently, that didn’t work out that well for her when she tried telling one of the Tauren what to do because the fellow started acting as dumb as an Orc peon, so, she got up closer to him to yell some more and he promptly sat on her. I heard the muffle screams and the laughter up here in the office and had to go down and put a stop to it before the fellow killed the Boss’s sister. I couldn’t help it, I was laughing so hard that I had tears streaming down my face. Let’s just say that she blew outta the warehouse like someone had thrown a bomb at her – now, there’s a thought.
I know it wasn’t nice, however, she’s not nice at all, we all kind of stood there and laughed because the look on her face was classic. Let’s just say that that fancy hairdo of hers was tangled up – I did tell the Tauren that he didn’t need to add insult to injury by farting on her while he was sitting on her – we all laughed some more about that.
Hey, we don’t have to treat her any differently than we do each other. She’s just one of “us” now and nothing special. If she is going to try to terrorize the help, we can terrorize right back. I just hope that her brother doesn’t put her “in charge” of anything or we’re all gonna be in some serious trouble.
I know that she is going to be in for one heck of a surprise when she takes her armor out of her locker and takes off to hunt. Most of us wear our armor all of the time and we take care of cleaning it ourselves. No, she wasn’t going to clean her armor, one of us was supposed to do it. Okay, that’s all well and good, however, it kind of fell to the bottom of the list of things to do.
I know that I was a little surprised when one of little Pandaren took the gear out of the locker and started cleaning it – it sure was shiny and you’d could see yourself in it, it was that shiny. I could never get my armor to look like that and asked him what he did – you know some kind special Pandaren magic trick? I almost fell off my feet when he told me what he had used to give that armor that shine – boar fat – he rubbed boar fat all over the armor and wiped it off so it didn’t feel greasy. Oh boy, she is going to attract anything on four feet that is looking for an easy meal. I know I was cracking up with that idea and just decided that it would be one of those pranks that I would keep to myself. Well, if she gets eaten by a bear, it’s not my fault.
I wonder if Miss Faendra gets the idea that the rest of us don’t really like her all that much?
Well, Zippie and Zednick got back home and I’m happy that I don’t have to walk around acting like the boss anymore. That was hard work and I would much rather have been out hunting. Yep, I was the “Hunter In Charge” and can’t say that I liked it much. I hope they don’t make a habit of that too often because I’ll be forced to stay busy elsewhere if they do. Make one of the Tauren or even a Forsaken with a head for figures do it – yeah, that’s the ticket, a Forsaken that has all of their fingers and toes so they can count.
Dooddah
